My brain is not working and I don't like it one bit.

I just had some serious misfiring in my brain. And, I didn't like it one bit. My accountant asked me to get some financial information about an account I have, so I called the funds customer service. They asked for my account # or SS#. Half way thru the SS # I couldn't remember it. So, I read the acct # to the representative. He then said he had to confirm the SS#. I screwed it up giving him the wrong number. I even wrote it down to read to him thinking maybe my mouth just wasn't working. Nope, I wrote it down wrong. Then, I gave him the wrong phone number. He told me I was close on the SS# which I eventually figured out but consistently gave him the wrong phone number. All the numbers were transposed. I didn't like that one bit. Its a horrible feeling. I remember my Grampy talking years ago when he called someone he repeatedly gave his Army # (which he didn't use for 50+ years) instead of his SS# and was sure he was giving the correct number. We chalked it up to him being old. I'm not old.

I went to a counselor today. I was petrified to go...I kept telling Brian I didn't want to but I finally did. I guess I'm glad...he acknowledged a lot of things I've been feeling/thinking lately. Therapy/counseling is often shunned or looked down upon, but I'm all for it. Its like having a very unbiased friend listen to your problems. I could tell my problems to Brian or Laura and they still seem so bad in my head. As I was sitting there talking to Bob, I swear at times I was thinking, its really not that bad as I think it is. I was actually a little embarrassed even. I'm a "scientific" kind of person, so he explained a lot of physiology/pathologic stuff to me about the brain which made me feel better about why I "think" and "analyze" so much. He gave me the name of some books/CD's to look at to help with that aspect of things. I guess overall, it was a good experience. Nothing earth shaking happened and I didn't solve any of my or the worlds problems, but it was good just to get stuff out there. I walked out a little more relaxed then when I walked in.

Hopefully everything will get on track here and I'll be back to my normal self. I don't want to give the impression I'm a crazy basket case, because I'm really not. I just really stress myself out over a lot of petty stuff. There's been a lot of changes lately. For basically the last 2-3 years I've been by myself and had no one really to worry about. Now I've got an almost immediate family, a house that is not just occupied by me and a cat anymore, work has become 10 x more stressful, I reconciled with some friends I thought I'd never talk to again and lets be serious, with all my WW talk, I've got a baseline issue w/ self-esteem when it comes to my views of weight, etc. Its always a fear in the back of my head, especially when things get stressful. So at least now by talking to Bob, I'm optimistic. Just bear with me for a few weeks of my "Eeyore" type posts and I'll be back to normal in no time. And hopefully back on track w/ WW. Good news...although I didn't WI this week, my bathroom scale said I was 168.8. Its not at the 166 like the last WI, but its below 170 and I'll take it. I'm finding fruit is very helpful and filling. Amazing. They should mention that in a meeting or something. Ha!