It is so depressing around here. I could never live in Seattle. All its done, and all its going to do is rain this week. Who wants to be productive in crap like this? Blah!
I decided to weigh-in at a meeting on Tuesday. The weigh-in lady handed me my book and said, "sorry, you gained." I looked at it and was super excited. Yeah, according to the last time I was there in March, I most definitely gained. But since returning from the cruise, I've lost nearly eight pounds. Its not coming off easily but its coming off. I'm back to cooking suppers, however I did give in today and ended up with a patty melt and onion rings for supper. I'm blaming it on the rain. :) Good news is the rye bread was just toasted, not lathered in lard then grilled in the frying pan. Still a lot of points, but I can work with it.
The only thing else going on is I'm trying to get back to sane. My doctor and I made the stupid decision to take me off one of my medicines for anxiety because a possible side effect of it was weight gain. I just about went crazy. Actually, I think I did a few times. WTH was I thinking? Finally got to the point where I was calm and stress free and thought it would be a smart idea to just stop the medicine that creates that feeling. I'd rather be 300 lbs, than EVER go through that mess again. I've been kinda low-key the last few weeks. Thats why. I didn't want to put myself in a position where I'd be angry-ish with someone even when I didn't mean to. Sometimes I really hate that I can't control anxiety issues and some depression stuff on my own. But I guess accepting it is one of the first steps to overcoming it. And, when all else fails, I just call my friend to come over and she tells stories about how she taped EVERYTHING to her desk to let the night guy borrowing her desk not to move stuff. I was laughing my butt off. Sad part is, in one of my minimal patience moods at work the other day I almost taped a patients head to the stretcher so he'd stop moving it. He ruined my plan though because as soon as I pulled the tape out he stopped. I need to come up with a story to compete with hers.
I hate swine flu. I hate people who think they have swine flu even though they aren't sick. I hate the masks we have to wear because people who aren't sick think they are sick with swine flu. I don't even like the name of swine flu because it makes me think of Babe the pig, and there's no way he'd do something like harm mankind with a flu. And, we can thank the media for most of this over-reaction. Yes, its better to be on the safe side, but I don't see how we can compare this to the pandemic of 1918 or whatever it was. That was almost 100 years ago. Medicine and technology have definitely improved in that time. And the biggest kicker of them all, if EVERY flu season was treated in the manner we're treating it now (closing schools, masks, stay home, Tamiflu, etc.) the number of people getting and dying from the regular flu would decrease. Maybe the gov't is afraid we'll all grow curly pig tails or something from this version. The flu might be worth it. I think I'd look cute with a curly-Q tail on my backside. I've the got the ham hocks already....might as go all out.
Its 2am and I'm off to bed, hopefully. I pray everyone forgets how to call 911 tonight. It would be wonderful to sleep a few hours straight. There's one thing rain is good for...meditating me off to la-la land.
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